Most newborns arrive during the spring and summer months. During these times, we happily shower them with gifts to welcome them into the world. However, before I had kids of my own, I didn't realize that some of the gifts I gave a new mom turned out to be her worst nightmare. 

To all the well-intentioned friends and grandparents about to shop for that new bundle of joy, please know that as much as we moms are grateful for your generosity, there are just some gifts that should stay at the store.    

As a public service to gift givers everywhere, I'm sharing my list of gentle “no-no” gifts for the new mommy. 

1.       Stuffed animals  

While the first few stuffed toys a new parent receives are cute, experienced moms know that after the first week, stuffed animals generally serve no other function than to crowd up a shelf, and then they become the source of an argument between parent and child when it’s time to send the stuffed bear off to the donation pile. Resist the temptation. I made this mistake before and I’m still feeling guilty.

2.       Any outfit that requires more than 60 seconds to put on the baby 

As irresistible as that frilly dress with lace and rhinestone bloomers looks in the store, trying to put that outfit on a squirmy baby is enough to make a sleep-deprived mom break out in a sweat and, possibly, tears. We are grateful for your kind gift, but it could make us wish that we had three hands: one hand to hold baby to ensure she doesn’t roll off the changing table, one hand to straighten out the lace — and one hand to poke ourselves in the eye from the misery.

3.       Any clothing that could be too small for baby 

If possible, do some recon and figure out what size a child is before you buy clothes for him. As a general rule, it’s always safer to buy a bigger size than the child’s age. A child may be 9 months old, but it doesn’t mean he wears a size “9 months.”  I’ve gifted many outfits, later to regretfully discover the baby was bigger than I thought. The reverse was also true: my chubby little Max was wearing size 9 months when he was 4 months old, and a lot of generous gifts were never worn.  If in doubt: always include a gift receipt.

4. Loud musical toys 

These are perhaps the most offensive gifts of all. It’s easy to see why toys with blinking lights and catchy melodies may seem like a good choice in the store: they’re cool, they light up and you don’t have to listen to more than the six-second demo. I mean, who doesn’t like an awesome electric guitar? I’ll tell you who: the mom who has to hear that same song for hours on end, and then have it scare her half to death when she accidentally trips on it in the middle of the night. I committed this error when I gave my nephew a ball that lit up and played what I realize now is the most annoying version of “Pop Goes the Weasel.” Thank goodness my sister-in-law had the decency not to return the favor when my kids were born. Most mommies agree: this gift is enough to get you hauled into the street and shot. (Or at least forced to babysit.)

We all know that it’s the thought that counts, but here are some ideas that many new moms have appreciated most:

• Time:  Offer to grocery shop, tidy up or simply hold the baby while she gets a pedicure or sleeps. Best gift ever!


• Meal delivery service: The last thing she probably wants to do is chef up dinner, so meals from services can be a welcome break.


• Personalized stationary with the newborn’s name. She will have so many thank you cards to write that she’ll appreciate the gesture. Plus, baby can’t outgrow them!


• Anything off her registry. She chose it. She wants it.

If ever in doubt about gift giving, just ask the new mom what she needs. But don’t be surprised if it turns out to be simply folded laundry or a shower. That, my friends, is priceless. 

So Moms, have I forgotten anything? What are some “no-no” gifts you wish you hadn’t received or some gifts you couldn’t have lived without?